It's all downhill from here...
You know that person on the plane who LOLs while watching an episode of The King of Queens? That person swears she’s being ironic! And! That person was probably just a little tipsy. We all know that the whole cabin pressure thing coupled with the mini-bottle of wine thing can really eff you up. Like, for real, that person would never LOL at a Kevin James joke while her fellow passengers eye rolled. But if she did, her fellow passengers shouldn’t talk, OK, because everyone can see you watching Fox News, fellow passenger. Who does that out in the open?

You know that person on the plane who LOLs while watching an episode of The King of Queens? That person swears she’s being ironic! And! That person was probably just a little tipsy. We all know that the whole cabin pressure thing coupled with the mini-bottle of wine thing can really eff you up. Like, for real, that person would never LOL at a Kevin James joke while her fellow passengers eye rolled. But if she did, her fellow passengers shouldn’t talk, OK, because everyone can see you watching Fox News, fellow passenger. Who does that out in the open?

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1st Apr 2012 | Nº 4
Schiller’s Storm: Makers Mark with a brew of ginger pineapple and plum The drink: refreshing. The mac n’ cheese: heart attack inducing. The waiter: Looked just like my 10th grade English teacher, who incidentally my brother once saw naked. But that’s a whole other story.

Schiller’s Storm: Makers Mark with a brew of ginger pineapple and plum

The drink: refreshing. The mac n’ cheese: heart attack inducing. The waiter: Looked just like my 10th grade English teacher, who incidentally my brother once saw naked. But that’s a whole other story.

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31st Mar 2012 | Nº 6

Clover Club, Brooklyn

Oops! Popped into a bar for a quick drink that turned into three. I tried to blame my over consumption on the bartender, stating he was a real pusher man, but was told by eye witnesses that his pressure consisted of “can I get you anything else?” I think you see what I mean. Pusher. Getting drunk at 2 PM would have been all fine and well but I was heading to the Ms. Foundation to meet a friend and get my Feminist badge on foursquare and … oh it was fine. The odor of burning bras totally masked the booze on my breath.

Port of Call: Gin, ruby port, lemon juice, cinnamon bark syrup, dash of aromatic bitters, and cranberry preserve

Left Hand: Bourbon, chocolate bitters, and house made sweet vermouth (Sweet vermouth and Punt e Mes in equal parts)

Clover Club: Gin, dry vermouth, house made raspberry syrup, lemon and egg white

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30th Mar 2012 | Nº 5
I visited my brother in Cambridge and some of his MIT nerd friends offered me this ‘85 wine. It tasted like tomato juice so if this is what rich people are doing, saving wine in cellars so that they can have expensive V8, then rich people really are out of touch. Hey rich people, WalMart sells V8 for like 3.99! (Maybe, I don’t know. I just pulled that number out of thin air. I don’t drink V8 and I’m a West Coast snob so I don’t shop at WalMart, duhz). But I suspect this wine was a mistake and that these MIT nerds need to spend a little less time getting string theory right and a little more time storing their wine right. Ziiiiiiiiiiiiiiing.

I visited my brother in Cambridge and some of his MIT nerd friends offered me this ‘85 wine. It tasted like tomato juice so if this is what rich people are doing, saving wine in cellars so that they can have expensive V8, then rich people really are out of touch. Hey rich people, WalMart sells V8 for like 3.99! (Maybe, I don’t know. I just pulled that number out of thin air. I don’t drink V8 and I’m a West Coast snob so I don’t shop at WalMart, duhz). But I suspect this wine was a mistake and that these MIT nerds need to spend a little less time getting string theory right and a little more time storing their wine right. Ziiiiiiiiiiiiiiing.

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18th Mar 2012 | Nº 2
Green beer is a delicate thing, something that can come only once a year. This delicious brew is made with only the freshest of hops and malts and green shit. And with water that is tapped from the Rockies or maybe from the Dasanis. I don’t know, but it’s really special.

Green beer is a delicate thing, something that can come only once a year. This delicious brew is made with only the freshest of hops and malts and green shit. And with water that is tapped from the Rockies or maybe from the Dasanis. I don’t know, but it’s really special.

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Remember that one drink? That was a good one.